it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Randomize
