It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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