She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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