yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Randomize
