i can't believe i had my finger in that
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
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