"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
They are going to name an STD after you.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
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