ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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