ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
Randomize