Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Randomize
