Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
