Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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