Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
