i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
