Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
