Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
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