There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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