dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize
