dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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