your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
