like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
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