good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
Randomize
