did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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