Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
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