I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
Randomize
