You work out of a Hotel?
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize
