thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Randomize
