walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
