I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
