Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
