I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
Randomize
