So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
