its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
