Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
