wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Randomize
