someone owes me an orgasm
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
