Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Randomize
