what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Randomize
