btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize