dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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