I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Randomize
