"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
