Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
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