I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
