is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
Randomize
