Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
is wine microwaveable?
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
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