love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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