; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize
