I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Randomize
