he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
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