It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
She announced her abortion via fbk
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
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